Do you know what's happening to you, yet still can't change it?
Maybe you fully understand what your problem is. You recognize your fears, know that certain experiences have marked you, or even clearly see the repeating pattern.
And yet, you find yourself feeling, thinking, or reacting the same way again.
Sometimes, rationally understanding what is happening to us is not enough to change it.
I am Javi Mateo, a psychologist with a Postgraduate degree in Bioneuroemotion®. In my work, I integrate elements of this approach as a complementary tool to explore the emotions, beliefs, and patterns that may be influencing what you are experiencing.
We can start directly from what concerns you or what you want to change today. You don't need to have all the answers or perfectly explain what is happening to you.
Sessions can be conducted online or in person in Altea, in Spanish or English.
Do you want to know if this approach might be a good fit for you?
What is Bioneuroemotion®?
Bioneuroemotion® is a self-knowledge approach that seeks to understand how our emotions, beliefs, and experiences can influence the way we interpret and live certain situations.
The goal is to observe what is behind what concerns you or repeats in your life, identify patterns, and understand them from a broader perspective.
In my work as a psychologist, I integrate elements of this approach as a complementary tool, always starting from the specific situation you are experiencing at this moment.
Continue reading about my way of working
How can we work together?
Each person comes with a different story, but often with a similar feeling: “I know something isn't working in my life, but I can't change it.”
This may involve anxiety, fears, insecurity, relationship issues, emotional dependency, grief, guilt, stress, difficulty setting boundaries, compulsive behaviors, or simply the feeling of repeating the same pattern over and over.
You don't need to arrive with a diagnosis or perfectly explain what is happening to you. We can start with something much simpler:
“This is what is happening to me, and I want to understand why.”
When anxiety won't let you stop
Perhaps your mind won't rest, you constantly anticipate what could happen, or you need to feel that certain situations are under control. Sometimes it even seems like everything is fine, but your body and mind remain on alert.
Instead of focusing solely on making that feeling disappear, we observe what happens when it arises: what situation you are experiencing, what you fear might happen, what you are trying to control, and which emotions or beliefs are being activated.
Understanding better what happens inside you can help you relate differently to what triggers that response.
When you've lost the desire or purpose
There are moments when energy is lacking, motivation disappears, or things that used to be important no longer make sense.
It's not about forcing yourself to "think positively." It's about understanding what you are truly experiencing: what you've lost, what you've given up, what you need, what you're demanding of yourself, and how you're interpreting what has happened to you.
From there, we can explore the emotions, needs, and beliefs that are part of your experience and seek new ways to face the situation.
When your relationships always end up in the same place
Sometimes the people change, but the conflict looks too similar. Or you've been with your partner for years, and the same arguments arise again and again.
There may be fear of abandonment, jealousy, emotional dependency, need for recognition, difficulty setting boundaries, or expectations that never seem to be met.
Instead of only asking “Why does my partner do this?”, we also start to look at “What is this activating in me?”.
Exploring your relational patterns, emotional needs, and beliefs about love can help you understand what is happening within you, set boundaries, and decide more consciously what you want to do with that relationship.
“I know it's hurting me, but I can't let it go”
A behavior can be harmful while also fulfilling an emotional function. Perhaps for a few minutes it allows you to disconnect, reduce tension, avoid feeling lonely, or escape from a difficult emotion.
Therefore, instead of only focusing on “Why don't you just stop?”, we explore what happens before, during, and after that behavior. What triggers it? What emotion appears? What changes within you when you engage in it?
Understanding the function that behavior serves can help us identify what truly needs to be addressed.
When a loss prevents you from moving forward
Grief is not about forgetting. When we lose someone, we can also lose a way of life, a future we had imagined, a sense of security, or even a part of our own identity.
We can explore what truly hurts, what remains unresolved, and which emotions are still present: guilt, anger, fear, sadness, or a sense of injustice.
The aim is not to erase the memory but to integrate what has been lived and to continue building your life without denying what was important to you.
“I understand my problem perfectly, but I keep doing the same thing”
Understanding something intellectually does not always mean we have changed our automatic way of reacting.
You might know your story, be aware of your fear of abandonment, seek approval, or perfectly recognize which experiences have marked you. And yet, when a specific situation arises, you react exactly the same way.
That's why we don't only seek explanations. We work with real situations: what has happened, what you thought, what you felt, how you interpreted the situation, and what you did afterward.
Between what happens and our reaction lies a whole world of emotions, expectations, interpretations, and learnings that often operates automatically. When we begin to see it, we can also start to question it.
We start from what is happening to you today
From the first session, we work with the specific problem you bring. You don't need to prepare a perfect story or find the explanation for what is happening to you in advance.
The initial question can be very simple:
“What is happening right now in your life that you would like to change?”
From there, we explore what emotion that situation awakens, what meaning it has for you, which beliefs arise, and what patterns may be repeating.
Sometimes we start by asking:
“How can I get this to stop happening to me?”
And during the process, another question may arise:
“What can I understand about myself through what is happening to me?”
This change in perspective can be the beginning of a different way to face the situation.
An important clarification
Bioneuroemotion® is an approach to support and self-knowledge and does not replace psychological, psychiatric, or medical care when necessary.
In the case of anxiety or depression disorders, addictions, risk of self-harm, suicidal thoughts, or other significant mental health issues, it is essential to have the assessment and care of qualified healthcare professionals. If you are undergoing medical or pharmacological treatment, this should not be changed or discontinued as a result of starting this process.
When appropriate, this self-knowledge work can be conducted as a complement, and not as a substitute, for necessary healthcare.
Do you know what's happening to you, yet still can't change it?
Maybe you fully understand what your problem is. You recognize your fears, know that certain experiences have marked you, or even clearly see the repeating pattern.
And yet, you find yourself feeling, thinking, or reacting the same way again.
Sometimes, rationally understanding what is happening to us is not enough to change it.
I am Javi Mateo, a psychologist with a Postgraduate degree in Bioneuroemotion®. In my work, I integrate elements of this approach as a complementary tool to explore the emotions, beliefs, and patterns that may be influencing what you are experiencing.
We can start directly from what concerns you or what you want to change today. You don't need to have all the answers or perfectly explain what is happening to you.
Sessions can be conducted online or in person in Altea, in Spanish or English.
Do you want to know if this approach might be a good fit for you?
What is Bioneuroemotion®?
Bioneuroemotion® is a self-knowledge approach that seeks to understand how our emotions, beliefs, and experiences can influence the way we interpret and live certain situations.
The goal is to observe what is behind what concerns you or repeats in your life, identify patterns, and understand them from a broader perspective.
In my work as a psychologist, I integrate elements of this approach as a complementary tool, always starting from the specific situation you are experiencing at this moment.
Continue reading about my way of working
How can we work together?
Each person comes with a different story, but often with a similar feeling: “I know something isn't working in my life, but I can't change it.”
This may involve anxiety, fears, insecurity, relationship issues, emotional dependency, grief, guilt, stress, difficulty setting boundaries, compulsive behaviors, or simply the feeling of repeating the same pattern over and over.
You don't need to arrive with a diagnosis or perfectly explain what is happening to you. We can start with something much simpler:
“This is what is happening to me, and I want to understand why.”
When anxiety won't let you stop
Perhaps your mind won't rest, you constantly anticipate what could happen, or you need to feel that certain situations are under control. Sometimes it even seems like everything is fine, but your body and mind remain on alert.
Instead of focusing solely on making that feeling disappear, we observe what happens when it arises: what situation you are experiencing, what you fear might happen, what you are trying to control, and which emotions or beliefs are being activated.
Understanding better what happens inside you can help you relate differently to what triggers that response.
When you've lost the desire or purpose
There are moments when energy is lacking, motivation disappears, or things that used to be important no longer make sense.
It's not about forcing yourself to "think positively." It's about understanding what you are truly experiencing: what you've lost, what you've given up, what you need, what you're demanding of yourself, and how you're interpreting what has happened to you.
From there, we can explore the emotions, needs, and beliefs that are part of your experience and seek new ways to face the situation.
When your relationships always end up in the same place
Sometimes the people change, but the conflict looks too similar. Or you've been with your partner for years, and the same arguments arise again and again.
There may be fear of abandonment, jealousy, emotional dependency, need for recognition, difficulty setting boundaries, or expectations that never seem to be met.
Instead of only asking “Why does my partner do this?”, we also start to look at “What is this activating in me?”.
Exploring your relational patterns, emotional needs, and beliefs about love can help you understand what is happening within you, set boundaries, and decide more consciously what you want to do with that relationship.
“I know it's hurting me, but I can't let it go”
A behavior can be harmful while also fulfilling an emotional function. Perhaps for a few minutes it allows you to disconnect, reduce tension, avoid feeling lonely, or escape from a difficult emotion.
Therefore, instead of only focusing on “Why don't you just stop?”, we explore what happens before, during, and after that behavior. What triggers it? What emotion appears? What changes within you when you engage in it?
Understanding the function that behavior serves can help us identify what truly needs to be addressed.
When a loss prevents you from moving forward
Grief is not about forgetting. When we lose someone, we can also lose a way of life, a future we had imagined, a sense of security, or even a part of our own identity.
We can explore what truly hurts, what remains unresolved, and which emotions are still present: guilt, anger, fear, sadness, or a sense of injustice.
The aim is not to erase the memory but to integrate what has been lived and to continue building your life without denying what was important to you.
“I understand my problem perfectly, but I keep doing the same thing”
Understanding something intellectually does not always mean we have changed our automatic way of reacting.
You might know your story, be aware of your fear of abandonment, seek approval, or perfectly recognize which experiences have marked you. And yet, when a specific situation arises, you react exactly the same way.
That's why we don't only seek explanations. We work with real situations: what has happened, what you thought, what you felt, how you interpreted the situation, and what you did afterward.
Between what happens and our reaction lies a whole world of emotions, expectations, interpretations, and learnings that often operates automatically. When we begin to see it, we can also start to question it.
We start from what is happening to you today
From the first session, we work with the specific problem you bring. You don't need to prepare a perfect story or find the explanation for what is happening to you in advance.
The initial question can be very simple:
“What is happening right now in your life that you would like to change?”
From there, we explore what emotion that situation awakens, what meaning it has for you, which beliefs arise, and what patterns may be repeating.
Sometimes we start by asking:
“How can I get this to stop happening to me?”
And during the process, another question may arise:
“What can I understand about myself through what is happening to me?”
This change in perspective can be the beginning of a different way to face the situation.
An important clarification
Bioneuroemotion® is an approach to support and self-knowledge and does not replace psychological, psychiatric, or medical care when necessary.
In the case of anxiety or depression disorders, addictions, risk of self-harm, suicidal thoughts, or other significant mental health issues, it is essential to have the assessment and care of qualified healthcare professionals. If you are undergoing medical or pharmacological treatment, this should not be changed or discontinued as a result of starting this process.
When appropriate, this self-knowledge work can be conducted as a complement, and not as a substitute, for necessary healthcare.